The simple answer is yes.
The more complex answer is always.
As mentioned in this post, I wrote about Microsoft’s Kati Quigley and her thoughts on it Everyday negotiations It is not necessary to be a born negotiator.
Some people are born this way. If you are one of them … congratulations. If not, you must have had more than a few experiences where you either really liked or really hated the negotiating experience.
The good news is … you can learn to be a better negotiator.
negotiation is the ability to compromise between two or more people while manipulation just tries to satisfy its own desires.
Taking the time to understand the basics and prepare before heading into your next negotiation can pay off.
As you can expect, as you improve your negotiation skills, you will start to stand out in your career. Of course there’s more to a career than just negotiating, but if you think about it, negotiate before you take up a position and sometimes when you leave a role. So it is a good idea to improve your negotiation skills,
Manipulation is not a negotiation
The one-sided experience of manipulation deserves a moment in time.
The dealership dilemma
Car dealerships are one of the most common examples of challenging negotiations. Many people like the idea of buying a new car, but many are scared of buying one. Because of this, buying a car without haggling has become popular.
If you’ve ever bought a car, you’ve probably experienced some of the most direct, and often one-sided, types of negotiation. Most people don’t like this type of “negotiation” and will do everything possible to avoid it. The fact is, this is not a negotiation, this is manipulation. I don’t disparage auto salespeople. There are other sales roles in which manipulation is a given. When you realize it is happening, avoid it.
There are whole schools of thought around the psychology, sociology, and anthropology of manipulation to sell you something. And that may be why so many people avoid negotiation. Manipulation is often a monologue. One party is trying to persuade (force) you into a one-sided situation.
Negotiation is a dialogue
If you’re in a negotiation, you probably will know. You will feel and see the back and forth. They will believe that there is an opportunity to contribute, counter, accept or reject and walk away. A good negotiating experience lets all parties know that they have worked together to come up with a reasonable offer that meets the needs of all parties.
Five tips to improve your negotiation skills
From Kati Quigley’s negotiation tips
- Don’t ask for one thing – Determine what you want to ask for. You may think you are tipping, but the reality is that you are setting the stage for a deal.
- Have options – In parallel with Tip 1, make sure you’ve considered options. Also, prepare to hear things that you may not have expected.
- Good negotiation takes practice – This is no surprise. Practice whenever you can.
- Use questions for clarification – To make sure you understand (Habit 5 – Understand First – Stephen Covey), ask clarifying questions. If the other side isn’t ready to answer your question, you may have to step back from the negotiation. To get to the root of the problem, you can use The five whys
- Passing curve balls – Be ready to consider things that you didn’t expect or imagined. Be ready to pause and revisit the interview after you’ve had time to research, evaluate, and possibly speak to your colleagues.
Negotiating means being human
The reality is that we are always negotiating. Be it with ourselves, our spouse, our friends, our colleagues and of course our bosses, customers and business partners.
It is better to be prepared and ready. This is what Kati’s points emphasize. There is always room for improvement.
So are we negotiating?
Yes and always. Be prepared.
The contribution Are we negotiating? first appeared on the Personal Branding Blog – Stand Out in Your Career